The offer headline...something copywriters must remember

I'm working on rewriting the copy for a site that's not getting much conversion. We'll see how it goes in testing but the current site has three problems:

1. The copy is too corporate (fluff-speak).


2. Some of the copy focuses too much on the problems and not the solutions.


3. There's a really good offer but you wouldn't know it from the current copy.

So...I'll fix the first one by using direct response techniques. I'll fix the second by selling happiness. Third...get the offer in the headline on at least one page.

Sometimes, I get too far into my headline templates and fail to remember offer headlines. These get straight to the point. Here's a good one from Creative Direct Marketing Group. No goofing around here...SAVE....

Offer Headline

I'm a direct response copywriter based in Charlotte NC USA. My website is here.

A web copywriting reminder from HGL

I haven't been reading about direct response copywriting as much as I like to...I've been writing direct response copy. Good problem to have.

But last night, I made the effort to dig into On the Art of Writing Copy by Herschell Gordon Lewis. I 'follow' three copywriters. Dan Kennedy, Andrew Wood, and HGL.

1. Andrew Wood (The Legend) for his enthusiasm and salesmanship.


2. Dan Kennedy for creativity and technique.


3. HGL for technique and tight writing.

On the Art came out in 2004...sort of the adolescent years of the Internet. The chapter about web writing is excellent and includes this one gem...

"If you state who and what you are instead of stating, quickly and dynamically, a recognizable benefit that will transform the surfer into a visitor, forget it."

Later, HGL stresses the importance of a great offer, quickly communicated. And hammers branding and image websites.

I once heard an interview with HGL and he spoke at length about continuity programs, especially for plates and similar items. Maybe a lost art today...book of the month club and all...wouldn't it be great to get one of those going.

THANKS to HGL for all his books. Some of the best copywriting books...some of the best books about writing.

*

I'm a direct response copywriter based in Charlotte, N.C. USA. My site is here. WARNING: IT'S NOT AN IMAGE SITE...

The Google Police...good news or bad news for the copywriter?

I should be, I know, but I'm not as up on Google AdWords and search as the experts. It's all so technical and my place in the marketing universe is in conversion, not traffic.

Get people to your site and I will help you get your visitors to get their credit card out or opt in to your email database.

Increasingly I'm being contracted to write, or revise, copy for landing pages Google has blacklisted. I was looking at one today and the page is pretty straightforward. I've seen a LOT worse.

I'm going through Google's guidelines now. You can see the page here. It's all new to me. It seems Google has robots who do the 'triage' then actual human beings take over. But getting specific feedback is well-nigh impossible, I'm told.

For copywriters, it's both good news and bad news. The last thing I want to happen is to write copy that Google rejects. But how do I tell? The art and science of direct response copywriting is to state benefits that will be attractive to a buyer while making sure they don't sound crazy or unbelievable. Readers are intelligent. They understand this key concept...if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. I think Google should let the reader decide and Google should not be the judge and jury. Plus the guarantee is ALWAYS vital.

eBay is full of fraud...I've seen tons of fake golf clubs there. Is Google blacklisting all that? What about content that passes Google's guidelines but is a total fraud?

Plus...Google is starting to cross the line between 'editorial' and 'advertising' especially with Google Places. And what about all those comments...user-generated content is ALWAYS open to abuse. Who is policing that?

On the other hand, being "Google slapped" provides opportunities for copywriters who can "fix" pages. Which is what I'll be trying to do over the next few days. Will I get Google off this client's back?

*

As an aside, I'm one of those writers who believes that a split infinitive is shoddy writing. Look at this howler on the AdWords page...

"As part of our commitment to making AdWords as effective an advertising program as possible, we've outlined some site design guidelines to better serve our users, advertisers, and publishers."

My italics.

*

I'm a direct response copywriter based in Charlotte, N.C. USA. My site is here.

Does direct response copywriting have to be obnoxious or tacky?

One of the biggest misconceptions about direct response copywriting...and all of direct response...is that you have be obnoxious and hyperventilate.

As an aside, I once received a rejection letter from a big publisher saying "the prose hyperventilates a bit" which I took as a massive compliment.

Direct response can be obnoxious at times...and it should be. However, the style can be toned down while using all the tactics. Here's a link to a great podcast from Will Swayne about this subject.

I was writing content today with the volume at 11. The conversation in the copy was between a big-time Internet marketer and people he wants to subscribe to a website. His emails are really loud. However, I wrote copy last week for a client who wants direct response copy but very much toned down.

Backing up your product's benefit

I'm at the second day of the PGA Merchandise Show in Orlando and I saw a company called SKB. They make hard cases for golf clubs. I have one of their cases and it's an excellent product. Take a look at the photo. They back up the benefit of the product, keeping your clubs safe from baggage handlers, with a $1500 guarantee.

In copywriting and marketing, the guarantee is extremely important and it can make the difference between making a sale and not making a sale. Many companies build all their marketing around the guarantee. Domino's and FedEx are two excellent examples.

Also note the prominent use of the magic word, FREE...

*

A great example of a product guarantee. If our case fails to protect your clubs, we hand you [caption id="attachment_339" align="alignleft" width="225" caption="A great example of a product guarantee. If our case fails to protect your clubs, we hand you $1500."][/caption]500.

I'm a direct response copywriter with repeat clients around the world. My website is here.